Not all Activism and Roses: Crappy Days

So, for once, I am chronicling my low period, the period when I have a stream of crappy days. Yes, I am an activist, speaker, researcher, writer, small entrepreneur, wife, friend and  whole bunch of other things – but there are days like now when my body and mind does not like me. So the tiredness of being overdue for my semi-annual vacation, an acid reflux flare and a mix of a suspected cold and/or sinus infection means that I am feeling at my lowest, both physically and emotionally.

It sucks to be in this space but it is also part of life as someone with bipolar disorder. Your physical does affect your mental health and I would not be lying if I did not say that I had my moments of self-pity and “life sucks” over the past couple days.  I want to give one last bit to finish off many of the projects I have to complete and people I have to talk to. However, as I said to a friend, “Right now it seems as if my body has said to my will-to-work, Sit your b****h-a** down and be quiet. It’s MY time now”

So while my body takes back every ounce of sleep that it could, I gots to lay low. I prolly will go to the doctor tomorrow. Ugh!!! For driven me, it is like, dayum! But I am very conscious of that balance that I need to have of self-care. It doesn’t always work out perfectly but I take these times as warning signals and act accordingly. So, I am going to hand off what I need to tomorrow and then my vacation will officially start.

Author: writes4god

I am 36 year old Trini gal who is a researcher/disability activist/writer

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